Aspergers Lifestyle

Hello Fellow Aspies,

   I gotta tell you all that I am tired of picking up books and papers running titles like,
1)"Married to an Aspie: Somebody has to be the Adult.  or
2) You Can't Change 'Em -- Why Try?   or
3) I Divorced my Aspie... I just can't Say Why,"
               and titles ad nausem.

It isn't that these folks aren't trying to help the world of 'Aspie-ism' or they mean to worry or upset the 'normals'.  It is that they don't get the fact that (relatively) we high performing Aspies are a society unto ourselves: complete with heroes and villains that affect our lives differently than 'normals' and that difference is simply very cool.  We need to look only look as far as to Einstein, Michelangelo, Michael Jackson and, of course, Sheldon Cooper to see our Aspie mates.

How many of us have had a family member say, "Why can't you just pull yourself up by your bootstraps and do like Bill Gates did?  You know, he has Aspersers too."  At this point my first reaction is just to slap whomever is talking to me. But as a rule, I don't.  Family, friends, teachers (FFTs) that won't educate themselves as to what \ who Aspies are don't deserve the time. Our way of seeing the world is ours and just as legitimate as anyone else's.  SO THERE FFTs!

I (a true Aspie) barely can take 'normal clusters' [meaning a group of less that ten] in very small doses. I am more OK to talk to 300 people because I control the show and they are there to see me (!) not the other way around.  This soothes that Aspie spirit that later will almost run to the car so I don't have to talk to any of those 300.

We are a society of people who are hopefully surrounded by people that love us for who we are and not for what they think we can be.  We, as a friend \ self supported group, are not wrong in what we do or the way we do it.  It happily is only different truths we see. We can be part of society of great patient wives, parents or friends and be perfectly happy. However, we can be a society of one and be perfectly happy.  My Dad, Heaven love him, would sit on the stoop and watch me throw a golf ball against the steps. After a hour or so Dad would stand up, stretch, and ask,
    "Why don't you go play with your friends?
    " Don't want to.
    " It can't be that much fun out here by yourself.
    " Sure it is,"  and I would go back to throwing the golf ball against the steps and Dad would go into the house and say, "Lois, can't you do anything about him?"  At that they just laughed at the inside joke.  God love 'em both.  I sure did.

As things go my Dad was pretty well off and he spent a lot of money to have the local psychologists teach me how to look people in the eyes.  That never has really completely taken I guess because when I am upset or feel stress, my eyes go directly on the floor and stay there.  Valorie, my patient and loving wife, has had long discussions with me in which she has rarely seen my eyes.  I am looking at the floor somewhere.

This one idiosyncrasy has cost me greatly in the worlds of career, romance and finance.  More on this later.

TTFN

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  The Next Posts planned are:  ////////////////////////////
1) "I Married to an Aspie: Why did the gods do this to me,  or
2)  I Can't Change my Aspie -- Why Keep Trying?  
3)  I'm divorcing my Aspie... I just can't even say Why,"
4)  So you really do bathe, right?
          If you have other ideas, just send the along to f.glotz@yahoo.com.